A few months ago I posted a blog about Why Do Families Return From Ukraine Without a Child. I am saddened that this continues to happen to families.
Occasionally families want to share their Ukrainian adoption experiences. But they want to stay anonymous. So they email me their story and I post it.
This blog contains quotes from AC who had an appointment at the SDAPRC this year. She gave me permission to reprint her entire email.
I think AC’s email partly explains why the Canadian Embassy in Kyiv recently updated their web site with new age restrictions. It sounds a lot like past information from the NAC/SDAPRC. Ukraine is trying to grow their domestic adoption. I remember in 2003 when the NAC started stating that no children under 5 years were available. And they only had sick babies.
Given the increased focus on encouraging domestic adoption, healthy infants will not be put on the list for consideration for international adoption. Furthermore, given that children adopted internationally after the age of 13 often encounter serious adaptation and integration problems, these children will also not be considered for international adoption. This means that, in practice, the list of children eligible for international adoption will only contain children aged between 4 and 11. The Ukrainian authorities will only allow adoptive parents to adopt younger children if these have serious medical conditions (HIV/AIDS, foetal-alcohol syndrome, serious mental or physical handicaps, etc.) or if they are part of a sibling group containing older children.
Over on FRUA there is some discussion over this “change”. I really don’t think Canada or Ukraine has “changed”. I don’t think there are any new age restrictions on adopted children. I think the Canadian Embassy in Kyiv talked to someone in the SDAPRC. And they did this because AC asked them for help. And this SDAPRC employee expressed a strong opinion which was then posted.
Remember the SDAPRC still doesn’t have a director. They are a leaderless organization that is just trying to get though the day.
AC began doing the dossier and other adoption paperwork in June 2006. The dossier was submitted to the SDAPRC in 2007.
We couldn’t believe our facilitator when she called me in March, to tell us that we were given an appointment in April. Our prayers were answers and we couldn’t believe how blessed and wonderful this was… My husband and I were not ready for such an early date, nonetheless, we weren’t going to complain about it.
So, we planned, packed our bags and toys of course and set off to Ukraine. After 2 planes, buses, cars and a total of 14 hours, my son was my hero… At 33 months, he was great throughout the whole travelling…
Date with the SDA… My husband and I were somewhat nervous, but since we’ve been there, done that [adopted internationally], it was less frightening but rather more exciting… Our [desire] was to adopt a child under 24 months.
From: AC
The average age for Ukrainian adopted children seems to be between 4 and 5 years of age.
It is difficult to adopt a child this young from Ukraine. But it is possible. Dave and Tam adopted a 17 month old in April 2007. Warchol family adopted a 2 year old in December 2006. It is especially possible if you are open to different health issues; Down syndrome, hepatitis, missing limbs, etc…
But AC is a Canadian and this creates barriers for her family. She and her husband cannot adopt any child who will be a burden on the Canadian socialized medical system.
Personally after doing a lot of self evaluation, I decided to try and avoid adopting a child with missing limbs, mental retardation and RAD. I believe every family should understand their limits and parenting abilities.
And those families’ choices should be respected.
AC’s story is to be continued on Tuesday.